A Minister Making Sense of Her Modeling Career

The other week I had an audition at Universal Studios. I was the mother of a beautiful little girl.  They asked us to act as if we were in the theme park very excited about the fireworks, roller coasters, etc.  We spoke about the rollers coasters with excitement, actually jumped up and down, and pointed towards the imaginary theme park.  It was fun! 

After the audition I looked at the little girl and smiled.  “You did a great job! Hi five!”  She smiled at me.  After that I started to process the audition. “I didn’t know the name of any of the roller coasters! But, we did our best and we did well.”  The beautiful little girl looked at me with anxious eyes. As we walked alongside her biological mother the baby girl looked at her and asked, “Mama, will we not get the part since we didn’t know the name of the roller coasters?”  I could tell her heart had speed up. Her mother looked at her and said, “Sweetheart, we do this for fun. Just have fun! This is all for fun!”  The beautiful girl looked at her mother with an anxious smile. My heart tensed up as I looked at the baby girl with concern.  I could totally relate.

In order to survive in the entertainment industry, regardless of how old a person is, you have to have some thick skin.  I entered this business and submitted my pictures to agencies because I wanted to try it out.  I wanted to have fun taking pictures and share with others through smiling!  But, I quickly realized that modeling, commercial acting, film acting, commercial print modeling and working with agencies and client’s is a business. Either they like you or they don’t.  Either they like your look or they don’t.  Either your pictures are good enough or they are not.  In order to take this business seriously you have to get training, superb photos, and find your market. Out of the 6 agencies I have signed with, once I submitted my pictures to them they called or emailed me back within 30 minutes of my submission. The other’s never responded.  This is a yes or no business. 

When working with agencies if you are valuable to them, they invest in you. If you are not, your call will not be answered and your email will not be responded to.  Intense hugh?  I guess as I write this, I am working to make sense of it myself.  Working as a model gives me the flexibility to be able to help fund ministry initiatives, such as Testimonies of Hope: The Intercultural Christian Devotional Website at testimoniesofhope.org.  I am grateful for the opportunity to move forward in the entertainment business, however, I have to get thicker skin!

I continuosly have to remind myself that God thinks we are so special he knows every hair on our heads. "But even the hairs of your head are all counted. Do not be afraid; you are of more value than many sparrows (Luke 12: 7)." We are fearfully and wonderfully made. "I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalms 139:14)." We are valuable, loved, gifted, rare jewels.

Regardless of the career we are in we often have to prove ourselves, to show our worth to a client/employer who then confirms and affirms our value.  This is the reality of the world.  However, as children of God we must remember that ultimately our value comes from God who loves us unconditionally. This agape love gives us value regardless of if someone says yes or no to us.  Regardless of if someone says we are pretty or not.  Regardless of if someone says we are smart enough or not.  Because of God’s unconditional love towards us we can stand and be confident in our God given gifts and talents. We can let our light shine. "In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father in heaven (Matthew 5: 16)." That is what life is ultimately about.

So when I go for my next audition. Or get my next “first” in commercial print modeling and commercial acting I will walk in without anxiety, but the confidence that comes from knowing that our Heavenly Father has our back and that he will always see us as rubies, gems who he loves and values unconditionally. 

If I ever see the beautiful baby girl auditioning again I will tell her that regardless of what the world says, “You are God’s ruby, you are priceless, gifted, talented, smart, and loved.” 

Peace Ya'll,

Argrow "Kit" Evans

Testimonies of Hope: The Intercultural Christian Devotional Website Launch at testimoniesofhope.org

Spreading Hope and Love this Valentine's Day with the launch of Testimonies of Hope: The Intercultural Christian Devotional Website (Wooo hooo! Thank you God!)

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We pray that you are blessed by our Hope Artist Reflection's and Hope Writer Devotional's! Head on over to testimoniesofhope.org Welcome to the Testimonies of Hope family!

In Hope,

Kit Evans
Founder, Testimonies of Hope: The Intercultural Christian Devotional Website
testimoniesofhope.org
info@testimoniesofhope.org

Reflections: First National Commercial Call Back and Making Sense of Life... "Relax, I Got This!" - Jesus

"Relax, I Got This" -  Jesus

Last week I had my first call back for a national commercial.  There were about 6 other women who had call backs, 6 men, and 6 cutie pututie boys. I knew my lines, my on camera husband was Omarr Dixon (http://www.omarrdixon.com/) and my son was so sharp with the casting director's recommendations.  We had fun! It felt good. However, I did not receive a call back for the job. I'm learning that in this business it's not necessarily about how well you  perform, but it's also about what the casting director is looking for. For whatever reason I did not get this particular job, but this just means that there will be another opportunity for me. 

Over the last 8 months I have been working to figure out next steps post graduation.  I graduated from seminary in May 2012.  When I first graduated I asked myself:  What in the world am I supposed to be doing?  I applied for non-profit and faith based jobs.  Networked my butt off!  Started dream chasing in the area of modeling! Started a speaker's academy program to move forward with my speaking business.  I moved across the country to be closer to my family.  Worked to foster new and healthy long term relationships.  Over the months I have worked to listen to my heart and to also see what actually is sticking.  I figured if I put the time into something that I enjoy and it actually sticks or something good comes out of it...keep walking through the door.  

When I first started with the modeling agency I thought that this was a great opportunity to try this with an agency at least once.  I told myself "at least I can say I tried."  I did my first modeling gig with Disney and it was a lot of fun. I didn't think I would get other calls. As opportunities present themselves I am realizing that modeling, acting, hosting is a business.  It is a lot of fun, but there can also be a lot of pressure to get the job, get the call back, and make the money. I actually got upset when I saw how much money someone makes for doing a national commercial.  As a former public school teacher I was actually offended because there was absolutely no comparison.  

As I move forward I am realizing that God has a plan for everything and everyone. I am seminary trained, called to ministry, and God has me in this field doing this type of work.  Really? Romans 8: 28 notes, "We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose."    Romans 12: 6 reads:  "Since we have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, each of us is to exercise them accordingly."  The text goes on to speak about different spiritual gifts. 

All things work together for good and we all have some type of gift that God has blessed us with.  Even if it seems random it is still a gift and can be used to build the kin-dom of God.  I have a t-shirt that says "Relax, I Got This" -Jesus.  We have to put in the hard work here on earth because "faith by itself, if it has no works, is dead." (James 2: 17) I also truly believe that God is often behind the scenes making things happen; sometimes when we least expect it.  God has our back!

On February 14, my friend Jacalyn Barnes and I am starting Testimonies of Hope: The Intercultural Christian Devotional Website at testimoniesofhope.org  Check it out!  If God gives you a voice and a gift, use it to build up the kin-dom!  I encourage you to move forward in those gifts while also letting folk know where your gifts come from, God.   

"Relax, I Got This" - Jesus. 

Blessings Ya'll,


Kit 

Alaska: Polar Bears, Global Warming, and Preserving God’s Creation

When I got off the plane in Alaska I was excited to step into the cold walkway from the plane leading to the physical airport.  I took a deep breath looking like a child visiting a candy store for the first time. I had never been to Alaska:  I love experiencing new things and new places so I was intrigued, excited!  One of the first things I saw in the airport was a huge model of a white polar bear.  As I looked in the glass case the bear towered over me and though it was not alive, my heart skipped a beat.  As I continued to look closely at the bear, it’s white fur, tall and strong stature I started to see that this huge creature in essence embraced it’s own beauty.  As I walked away I kept these thoughts in mind.

I went to Alaska for a community organizing and advocacy gathering with the General Board of Church and Society for the United Methodist Church.  I am grateful.  The topic: Climate & Environmental Justice, Sustainable Development & Ministry With The Poor. There was so much wisdom and knowledge in the room of scholars, activists, ministers, educators, but I remembered one simple quote:  “If you want to know about the polar bears, ask the bears.”  This is what Rev. Ray, a clergyman, and native Alaskan said regarding polar bears and global warming in Alaska.

Before coming to this meeting I had never thought about how polar bears are affected by climate change.  I knew things about climate change:  the climate is getting warmer and warmer around the world, we should use alternative means of energy, fair trade is awesome, animals are effected.  But, how really is this issue-affecting animals and people whose livelihood come from the land and sea?

Ray stated the fact that polar bears are diminishing. How and Why?  Because of increased temperatures and global warming sea ice is melting and it can’t support the weight of the bear.  The melting of the ice is also impacting access and the numbers of the polar bear’s prey.  Walrus’, seals, and other animal’s livelihood are taken away causing strain on their ability to survive. 

Climate Change is also impacting the native people of Alaska.  Rev. Ray spoke about how the Native people of Alaska are subsistence hunters and fisherman (hunting, fishing, gathering berries and food).  Global warming impacts their ability to get meat, keep meat, house their berries, and survive.  These realities also affect folk spiritually and culturally. 

During the gathering I learned so much about the realities of global warming around the world. Some I knew, some I didn’t.  The reality of mountain top removal in the Appalachian Mountains and it’s impact on poor people.  The truth about islands in the Pacific Islands being submerged:  people’s homes going away with the ocean and families being displaced. I was reminded that families throughout the world who live off of the land, particularly throughout Africa, are suffering because of drought and inability to get a harvest off of their crops because of climate change. How fishing communities income and livelihoods in Grand Bayou, Louisiana are being impacted negatively.  Global warming affects the privileged at times, but it is communities who are poor who bear the brunt of climate change.

As I write this and reflect I am working to make sense of this myself.  I am privileged in many ways. I drive a car, I have air condition and heat, I am able to purchase groceries from the store, and I can take long hot showers amongst other things. However, I am challenging myself and also anyone who reads this to think twice about how we use what we have.  Here is a couple of sites with helpful tips:  http://globalwarming-facts.info/50-tips.html http://environment.about.com/od/greenlivingdesign/a/public_transit.htm

Here are some quick tips I took from the above sites: 

1. Replace a regular light bulb with a compact fluorescent light bulb (cfl)

2. Recycle

3. Use Less Heat and Air Conditioning

4. Do not leave appliances on standby

5. Drive Smart

6. Buy Energy-Efficient Products

7. Use Less Hot Water

8. Turn stuff off!

9. Plant a Tree

10. Reuse your shopping bag

Genesis 1:1 reads: “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.” The text goes on to speak about God’s creation of the land, sea, animals, sky, seasons and the list illustrates the beauty of God’s creation. Bill McKibben, founder of 350.org, noted that global warming today is like Genesis 1 running backwards.  Yikes!

Intense blog, right?!  But, really, I am encouraging us both to think about the polar bears and how the issue of global warming affects animals, the land, the sea, and people in harsh ways.  We can start helping one light bulb at a time!

What do you all think about the issue of Global Warming and Climate Change? 

In Peace,

Kit

Hawaii The Beautiful and The Truth About Militarization and Colonization

Last week I was privileged to visit the beautiful island O'ahu in Hawaii.  On Tuesday I volunteered with a friend of a friend at the ocean; they say it was actually a pond!  For 3 and a-half hours we moved large rocks as a 13 person team to build a rock wall. For me this was labor intensive! The wall was built so that the employees of the pond could see the height of the water as it related to the ocean current. 

The rain fell upon us on the chilly, yet gorgeous night. As I looked down the shining rock wall and assembly line team I smiled.  I saw much beauty in the teamwork happening.  The team was passing rocks, building, laughing, joking, and setting a rock foundation. I was inspired. 

At the end of the building I wanted to take a picture of the rock wall.  Not because I was a tourist, but because the wall was extraordinarily beautiful.  I wanted to remember it.  As I got one of the women to use her cell phone to take the picture, a native Hawaiian laughed and said, “humph, tourists!”  I thought to myself, “Me, a tourist!”  My heart started to beat a little faster.  Without hesitation I said, “ If I were a normal tourist do you really think I would have spent my evening in the cold rain in the ocean moving super large rocks?  If I were here as a tourist I would be at a nice resort right now drinking a pina colada.” 

He looked at me and laughed noting, “You tourists like doing things like this to make you feel as if you are one of us.”  My presence seemed to disturb him. The people around kept silent.  Some people laughed with him, others looked at me with distanced concern.  For some reason I knew I needed to take a deep breathe and simply keep silent. So, I did.  In my mind I thought, “I never want to feel like I am anyone else other than myself.”  I walked away thinking, “Why would he seem so offended by my presence?  Who and what did I represent for him?   If I represented “tourist” for him, what did I trigger?”

I went to Hawaii for an advocacy and organizing meeting with the General Board of Church and Society for the United Methodist Church. The topic for the meeting was “immigration & global migration” and “indigenous peoples & Native peoples/Native Hawaiians.”  Within our organizing meetings I learned quite a lot from the Native Hawaiians who were present.  These insights helped me understand the young man at the pond’s reaction towards me a bit more. 

In the 1890’s the Kingdom of Hawaii was overthrown and with this reality and others Hawaii was colonized. This affected Native Hawaiin’s land, language, and culture. Can you imagine having all that you know stripped away from you?  Intense!  Since then the US military has taken over a large percentage of the Hawaiian land. The Native people of Hawaii considered much of which sacred. Highways have been built, military bases have been built, and migration to Hawaii continues to rise. 

As a result of militarization and colonialism native Hawaiian people’s cultural survival was and is impacted.  Native Hawaiians spirituality and livelihood is directly connected to the land. When this was taken away this impacted and is still impacting the community.  This is shown in high rates of homelessness, school drop out rates, higher infant mortality rates and the list goes on.

After digesting these realities I could now see how the native Hawaiian brother from the pond would feel a certain way about my presence at the pond.  Often times I go into other contexts as a visitor not knowing the history of systemic oppression that the native people have suffered.  His feelings were not just about me. I do believe for him the pond, the rocks, the ocean, the land these spaces were sacred for him and his ancestors. As an American, a “tourist," maybe for him I represented an invasive presence.  And if that was the reality, I have to give respect to this gentleman and his ancestors.  Maybe instead of me reacting, I could have fostered dialogue or maybe in that moment it was best to respect this brother and simply walk away. 

During our organizing and advocacy meetings there were several men and women working to restore the Hawaiian Kingdom.  They worked to embrace the language and teach, share the rituals with the next generation, preserve the land and culture. Though there was the reality of hurt sometimes present in their voices as they spoke there was a sense of power, passion, persistence, and perseverance that was inspiring. 

When visiting a new place I know it’s not always possible to learn the history of a specific context, but one thing I do know is that there are always systems of oppression at work.  Now, if I was to ever see the Hawaiian brother again I would be able to listen to his truth more, instead of making my own assumptions.  Mark 12: 31 notes, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.  There is no other commandment greater than these.” Hawaii is a beautiful island, but the native Hawaiian language, spirituality, land, and culture are even more beautiful. This is what deserves to be respected and preserved!

What My First Modeling Gig Taught Me: Smile and Think On Good Things

Yesterday was my first modeling gig booked by an agency.  It was for a Walt Disney catalogue!  When people work for Disney they look at this online catalogue to see how their costume should fit. When looking at the catalogue they will now see my model friend Chad and I!  I was a bit nervous about what they would dress me in, but it was actually a lot of fun.  I played dress up with a photographer and Disney crew for 5 and half hours.  And in the spirit of Disney I had to smile.  I remember in a counseling class I was told that people could smile solely with their eyes.  At the photo shoot it was important for me to smile with both my mouth, eyes; actually my entire face.

This continuous smiling caused me to be mindful about my thoughts. I had to stay positive about what I allowed to go through my mind.  My thoughts would often stray to relationship realities, stress, and life obstacles. But, when my thoughts shifted to these things I could feel the frown, the un joyful smile, the fake smiley eyes presenting themselves before the camera.  At times I had to force myself to think on good things. It was when I thought on good things that I allowed myself to enjoy the present. The beautiful costumes, the bright lights, the nice people. 

In life there are so many things that can bother us daily.  For some weeks I have been contemplating a recent relationship that was broken.  I reflected: “Did I make a mistake?  Should I have done this?  Should I have done that? Is it too late? What can I do?  Are they ok? Has my path been altered? Where should I go?  What do I need to do?

It is often imperative that we face our realities in order to move forward, however, it is also important to take the time to think on good things. Otherwise, life will overwhelm us.  We have to take things one-step at a time.  One day at a time. One hour at a time. Sometimes one minute at a time.  When things overwhelm us it shows up in our spirit, which reflects in our face, our eyes, our smile. 

When life gets you down and your face is showing it try to smile anyway.  This modeling gig taught me that when my mind stays thinking about the negative, smiling and thinking on good things could bring light into my spirit and heart.  

Philippians 4: 8 notes, “And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” (NLT)

Brothers and sisters, smile and think on good things!  

Job Fair: Remembering You Are Not Just A Number

I remember the excitement of getting into college.  I was going to attend one of the best public universities in North Carolina.  I heard great things about the school, but I also heard that I would just be a number.  “There are over 25,000 people at the university.  Your professors are not going to know you. You are just a number in the midst of a crowd of people.”  On my first day of class I remember getting a Personal ID Number.  I thought, well maybe they are right. I am just a small number at this big university. Or am I a special, unique, individual who has the ability to be a great student?

The other day I went to a job fair.  The line to enter was wrapped around the building. I could not help but question: within this job market am I just a number or am I really special?  What will I allow myself to believe? As I entered the large conference room with hundreds of job seekers and about 80 employers I thought about this job fair as a microcosm of the world. 

There are probably millions of people on this planet without a job and there are also millions of people on this planet who are unique, super talented with amazing gifts.  This world is extremely big and stepping out into it can cause one to feel vulnerable, anxious, and doubtful as if we are just a number in this big bad world.  But even in the midst of anxiety we are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139: 14).   We all have gifts.  Each has received a gift (1 Peter 4: 10).

In life there are sometimes trials and circumstances that cause us to move away from our gifts.  Sickness, layoffs, depression, foreclosure, unhealthy relationships, unplanned pregnancies, death, divorce, fatigue, laziness, and the list go on.  But, what do we do with our lives when unforeseen circumstances and trials come our way?  Do we give up on our gifts and dreams or do we put our faith into action, use our gifts, and push to be the best we can be?

God believes that we are so special he calls us by our name (Isaiah 43:1), not just a number. This is true at the university, job fair, on your current job, or anywhere else.  If God believes that we are so special, we must also believe this for ourselves.  In the movie, The Help, the main character would often tell a small child:  You are kind, smart, and important.  It’s true, believe it, don’t’ give up, keep pushing!

Be Encouraged,

 

 

Argrow ‘Kit” Evans